For Real Wedding Films gets a mention on The Knot!

For Real Wedding Films makes its first appearance on The Knot!

Family friends Alex and Sloane had a simply stunning wedding last August and we had the privilege of being their videographers.  Their wedding was so stunning that it landed them an article on the ever popular wedding site called The Knot.

Our friends Stephanie and John at Imagine It Photography did an amazing job photographing the wedding and their photos grace the article.

At the bottom of the article the other vendors of the wedding got mentioned too and we are there on the list!  No link, but hey, you can't have everything, right? :)

Just wanted to share our little joys with you all!

Need to save money on your wedding? Try a brunch reception!

So we got married young...at least according to my in-laws (They were in their 30's). Kurt and I had just graduated from college and being oh so crazy, got engaged our senior year and married the following winter.  

Winter?!  

Who gets married a week before Christmas?  

We crazy birds did!

(My poor mother who had to take care of all the out of town company right before a major holiday...and we had no concern of this as we were blissfully happy away on our honeymoon)

Ignorance can be bliss!

Anywho, one of the best pieces of being married right before Christmas was that the church was gloriously decorated.  We had no flowers to purchase, no decorations needed.  Poinsettas filled the sanctuary with beauty and regalness.

So, simple.

So beautiful.

So free.  :)

I just came across a blog that shared how the bride wanted a wedding brunch (including this cinnamon roll-flavored wedding cake-delish!).  I love the idea.  Again...

simple.

Beautiful.

A lot cheaper than a 3 course dinner meal.  

So, if you're trying to figure out how to cut costs, check out this idea as well as a number of ideas off this other fun blog (or this one), all about doing a wedding on a shoe string budget.

Life on a Tuesday: 3 Little Words (but not "I Love You")

Those 3 little words

We have some good friends, who have been living on the edge of the Amazon jungle in Ecuador for the past 2 years teaching & directing at a missionary school.  Kim and Doug packed up and moved themselves and their 4 children there.

Wow!

Crazy, right?!  

Honestly, I'm so inspired!  I get these ideas and then drive my husband nuts when I say "When can we go, babe?"  :)

It has been so fun to walk along side Kim and hear all the stories, the crazy jungle snake stories, as

well as the harder pieces, of doing life without much and having to start over in making friends, not being super warmly welcomed...etc.  

So, I got to chat with Kim last night.

I just love this woman.  Her transparency, her honesty, her deepness and how much we can just laugh about utterly goofy things too.  

And I made it a point to make sure I told her.  

Amongst other things, I told her how much I appreciate her and her friendship in my life.  It's such a blessing.

So simple really, but it just takes the effort & time &, well, the vulnerability to say so.  

My life is so much more rich, because she's is in it.

And the unexpected piece in all this, is that it gives the other person the space to share with you how you might be a blessing to them to.  I didn't expect to hear that from Kim, but what an encouragement when I heard her say "Beth, it's so mutual.  I appreciate you too."

Three small words, but with such great impact.

I know we all have key people in our life like this.  Does one of them need to be reminded of how much you care about them?  How truly thankful you are for them?

Be intentional, and step out and say it.  I think you'll be really glad you did!  (and of course, they will
too!  :)

BTW, Here's the link to Doug & Kim's blog in case you're curious of what life has been like for them in Shell, Ecuador.  

Yes, the piles in the house are talking to your wife

In our house we tend to have these piles that develop.  One is by the stairs to the basement.  These are

things that are supposed to go downstairs.  Another other pile is by the back door.  These are things destined for the garage, the trash, or the attic.

Then there's the desk in our kitchen.  It just collects all those things that go...somewhere.  

I do try to take things where they need to go, but more times than not I walk right past them because I'm on my way to do something else.  

I just discovered, however, that to Beth, these piles "scream" at her. 

Here's how Alison Armstrong put it in her book The Queen's Code.  The book is written as a fictional story, but she communicates male and female differences through the characters.  Here Claudia explains to a younger wife why her husband ignores the socks on the floor:

The socks are irrelevant to whatever Mike has committed himself to. Whatever he is focused on. It takes no effort for him to screen them out. He is not even consciously doing it. His brain takes care of that. The feminine brain, however, is taxed by the effort to screen out socks on the floor, crooked pillows, grungy counters and anything ugly. If a woman has to live in a mess, you will find her engrossed in a book or a movie in order to find some peace.”

However, to a woman “Every one of those things is ’talking’ to her. Demanding that she do something about them. Her awareness makes a disorderly environment ’loud’ and disruptive. It is

why a woman ’multitasks.’ Because the things in her environment are competing for her attention. Demanding that she attend to them. Literally, nagging her. And not only things. She is aware of the mental, physical and emotional states of all the people around her as well.”

Excerpt From: Alison A. Armstrong. “The Queen's Code.” Routledge. iBooks. 

Even though I'm still a male, I try to be much more sensitive to things that might "scream" at Beth.  This has also helped me not get frustrated at her when she is bothered by things that seem unimportant to me.  I've realized she's not me.  She's not a man.  She's sensitive to things I am not and I have the privilege to help bring some peace to her mind and heart.  

Sexy Saturdays: Relationship Wisdom from James Brown!

Beth and I just recently watched Get On Up, a movie based on the life of The Godfather of Soul,

James Brown.

The guy cracks me up.  His crazy moves, his insanely high pitched squeals, and funky hair all make him a riot to watch and listen to.  But I found a nugget of wisdom in his song It's a New Day.

When he asks do you love him, smile and kiss his cheek
Walk away and twist your hip, make sure you keep him weak

Don't let nobody take care your business better than you do
Do what he wants, give what he wants, respect will come to you.
And then you can hold your man...

The line that really gets me is "Don't let nobody take care your business better than you do."

When you've been married for a long time it's easy to stop doing the 'business' of turning each other on.  We've got bills to pay, cars to fix, kids to raise, laundry to do, money to make.

Remember, though, there's one person in the whole world that your spouse chose to experience intimacy with.  You.

Don't deny each other.  Don't withhold sex as a weapon or a threat.  Don't un-sexy yourself just because you have a ring on your finger.

Let's not see "what he (or she) wants" as a burden, but as a unique privilege to bring pleasure to our spouse's life in a way no one else can.  This is a relational glue that no other relationship has.

So, "twist your hip and make sure you keep him weak."

Friday: Men, hold the barf can

In this past post we talked about how women can understand men's nature to want to find the point of

what a woman is saying.

Men, when you're listening you want to find out "the point."

Women, generally, do not operate this way.  Talking for them has value in and of itself.  Science shows that positive chemicals are emitted inside women purely from talking.

When a woman is upset, specifically, often she needs you to just hold the bucket.

In essence, she just needs to barf out all of her feelings and thoughts.  You just need to stand there and hold the barf can.

For some men it is hard to see how this has value, but to a woman, this is how she gets to solutions.

Here are three reasons for you to take this advice:

1. She's different than you.  

John Gray in Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus said that women have a well inside of them.  When upset, they go in the well and they need to get all the way to the bottom.  It will seem like she's getting worse initially, but that's because she needs to go all the way down.  Once she hits the bottom, then, and only then, she can come up.


2. It's actually the way to help SOLVE her problem.

As a man, what you can do is help her get to the bottom of the well by listening, asking questions, and letting her express.  She even may eventually want advice (what you've been wanting to give aaaall along!).

3. It takes off the pressure.

While everything inside of you usually is going crazy trying to figure out how to fix your lady's situation, if you know she's just in the well, you can relax, knowing that she doesn't need you to figure it all out.  The best solution is holding the can.

So, next time your wife, fiancee, or girlfriend seems to be headed into the well, happily grab that trash can, put the other arm around her, and let her have a go!

The Flavor of a Wedding

Each wedding has a flavor.

One wedding that had a unique flavor was the wedding of Russ and Kathleen.

They married in a picturesque small town in Indiana.  It was so much fun to wed the feel of this tiny, American railroad town with the sacredness of the church and the detailed beauty of Kathleen's wedding dress.  That, coupled with sweet moment of Russ and Kathleen with their moms, made for such a touching wedding film intro.

Enjoy.


The Flavor of a Wedding from For Real Wedding Films on Vimeo.

Are you planning a wedding? Step away from the ledge

Fear

Anxiety

Stress

Overwhelmed

Exhaustion

Congratulations!  You're getting married!

Ha!  Oddly enough, many brides planning their weddings know the dichotomy of the above list.  

Take some advice from a photographer that we know from a wedding vendor forum.  She writes:

I spent the last week up until my last bride's wedding sending her daily text messages reminding her to take a deep breath and have a glass of wine.  

She was one second away from epic melt down so I played therapist/wedding planner/best friend/photographer hats the whole time.   

I sent her little notes like: 

"this is your daily off-the-ledge text message.  You hired professionals.  All you have to do is show up and let us handle it.  Now, go have a glass of wine and pet your dog."

-Claire Goodfriend from c. goodfriend photography

Good advice.  :)