Intimate Frustration

Figuring things out can be fun and well...super frustrating.

Here's a video of Celia, our youngest, trying to figure out how to make this toy car work for the first time!  She really has no idea!  lol!  :)

Here's something that is also super frustrating to a lot of young couples: Physical intimacy!

Yikes!

No one really talks about it, right!  In a helpful way, at least.

So, after our post about it last week, it was the most reached blog in months (minus wedding videos)....why?

Well, I think it's because it's super hard, confusing, and takes a lot of work to figure out...and again,
NO ONE really talks about it!  But secretly, I think, everyone, wants to figure it out!!  :)

So, this reminded us of the difficulty of intimacy.  When we first get married, we might have read a book or two, or got some advice from a good friend, but for the most part, we really don't have a clue as to how it all works.  I mean, we know how "it's supposed" to work, but to making it work - yikes, this is a huge learning curve!

H - U - G - E!!

 And for many of us, myself included, the beginning was really, really hard.  Like Celia with the toy car, we're pushing buttons, but have no idea what they do or how they work.  We are often just spinning our wheels, hoping that something might "make that car go"!  ;)   And the crazy part is that we think it should all work just magically and not only that, we should love the journey!?!

What?!

Here's what one dear friend & reader shared the other day:

I have said so often that there are a lot of things I wish someone had told me before we got married. I think for women raised in the church it's especially challenging because we are taught to stay pure for so long and then one day sex is not only allowed but expected. And this thing that you have been anticipating for years and expect to go perfectly just doesn't. And things don't always work right at first. I remember crying myself to sleep on our wedding night because I felt like a total failure and like I was the only one who couldn't figure everything out because no one talks about it after they get married!

So, if this is you....or if you can relate at all, (I was here a long time....longer than I had hoped!) I want to encourage you, not to give up.

Your spouse is worth it.

You are worth it.

Work together and find help in books, people, blogs, counselors, and trustworthy friends and family.  Believe it or not, you're more normal than you think!