Waiting to want it...ain't gonna happen.

Waiting to want to have sex - ummmm...probably isn't going to happen.  

It might be if the stars align just right, and you got that amazing 8+hrs of continual, glorious sleep,

and the kids listened to your every wish and obeyed...the first time!, and the magic genie came and cleaned your house....ummmm....again, probably isn't going to happen.

So, what's a woman to do?

My thoughts on this.....well.....is make it happen.

Clearly, not what I thought when we first got married.  

I thought sex would just happen.

Somehow it would be sponatenous and just so much fun.  We'd both be all there and all ready to enjoy it! (kinda like in the movies!)

Again, not so much.

So, here's reality, at least for us:

Sex happens (most of the time) with 2 key things: planning and intentionality.

Boy, that sounds like fun!  lol!  

Ok, not so romantic...but here's how we've come to look at it:  we want to prioritize each other and meet each other's needs.  So when supposedly "more important things" easily and normally come along, we already have "us time" planned in.  This helps protect us and communicates to each other that we value each other more than the other random things that bombard our lives. 

How do to this?

Well, one way we do this is that we simply sit down sometime on the weekend, before the next week rolls around, and as we talk about the upcoming week, we "schedule" in when we're going to have sex.  This may not be for everyone, but again...waiting to want sex, most likely isn't going to happen.  Actually statistics show that the greater frequency there is in sex, the more often you'll desire it  (particularly for a woman). The less frequency, the less desire.  So, we plan for it.  In our season of life with younger kiddos, we have to be more creative....during naptime or while the kiddos are watching a video, but at least, it's happening and I can gear up mentally for it.  

Sometimes we even plan who's "on" for our next loving making session - meaning that person is in charge of adding some creative element to it or just something to take it out of the everyday normal.  Sometimes, it might just be as simple as laying a different direction in bed...or maybe lighting some extra fun candles.  

Like anything else, it's the little touches and extra thoughts that really communicate love and care.  

Whatever it takes, make intimacy happen.  It communicates so much love to your man, especially if, as the women, you initiate!