The idea that men are visually wired (even after they've put on a wedding ring) is very upsetting for women and that is understandable. They have no analog for comparison. For most ladies, they like the appearance of a good-looking man, but it's minor in comparison to other attractions such as emotional connection and shared experiences. For men, however, physical attraction is pervasive.
The key that I wanted to point out is that we are talking about good men. Good men.
We're not talking about men with wandering hearts, or men who flaunt their looking in a way that embarrasses and shames their wives. These men have heart problems, not eye problems. It is not their masculinity at fault, but their values.
The good man, however, knows where his heart is: with his chosen love. The woman with the ring that he sacrificed to buy is the one he wants. He's obviously aware that some starlet in a movie (who has professional makeup artists and plastic surgeons on hand) has "wow" factor. But she is really irrelevant to him emotionally. He wants the woman next to him in bed who hasn't combed her hair yet. In other words, a good man, even though his noticing of other people's attractiveness still exists, truly wants you and you alone.
A good man needs to accept this about himself, but the greatest gift his wife and lover can give him is for her to accept him as well. That means embracing his masculinity. He probably hides these realities because, again, he loves you and knows it's hard to understand. But fully honoring his full masculinity communicates that you trust his heart and his full love and pleasure in you.
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