Saturday, August 29, 2015

Which came first? The Bedroom or the Breakfast?

So, it's Saturday morning and we're hungry!  :) (this is a typical morning)

This Saturday morning, we are without our five lovely little ones!  (not a typical morning!)

There's so much we could do:  go for a morning walk, have sex!!, clean the attic - boo!, what I really would like to do is to take Kurt out for breakfast.

Now if you asked him, he probably would pass on the breakfast and walk (and the attic, of course!).  Which leave that other little choice ;)

So, why are still going to breakfast?!  Ok, so there's this super cute breakfast place I've been wanting to take him to.  It's called Flap Jacks.  I've been twice before, but never with him.  And when do we ever get to go out for breakfast just by ourselves?!

Here's the heart of it:
When it comes to intimacy, men want sex to get connected.  Huh?!

But, as women, we want connection, and then we're able to pursue sex!

Thankfully, my man has learned this one.  He knows I need to connect with him first (and experience an amazing culinary delight). I want to talk about what's going on with him at a heart level.  I want to share what's going on with me.  I want to talk about stuff that always gets cut off short by little ones interrupting every other minute!  lol!

So...off we go to Flap Jacks!



Wednesday, August 26, 2015

Give a toast to your bride over and over again

Naturally, when we film weddings we expect best man and maid of honor toasts.  But at our most recent wedding the groom actually gave his own toast to his bride.  It was so fun and so sweet that someone remarked, "I want to marry him!"  :)

It reminds me just how easy it is to forget, now that we're married, to express our affection for each other in public.  Just yesterday, while chatting with our doctor at an appointment, I thought about this.  I made a point to praise Beth in that conversation.  Beth wasn't even there, but talking highly of her blessed my heart for her just a little bit more.  Good stuff!

    See more photos by our friends at Imagine It Photography

Monday, August 24, 2015

Arguments and feeling worthless

So, I pull up to a bank with three of our kids in the back seat.

I get out, lock the car, and walk to the ATM.  It is barely a few feet away from the car and I can see it
perfectly.  I realize when I enter that I have left my bank card at home.

Having been in the ATM lobby less than 45 seconds, I turn around to go back to the car and hold the door open for a woman.

She then proceeds criticize me for leaving my kids in the car.

As I'm driving away I'm thinking of all these arguments I could have had from "I was only in the bank for 45 seconds!" to "Who do you think you are, telling me what to do?"

Despite feeling justified in my choice, I begin to feel that creeping sense of worthlessness that I often experience when criticized.  My thoughts then go hunting for a source of worth-building material.  I consider what a good parent I am, how my marriage is something I feel proud of, how our videography business has grown, the positive impact we have on others, and on and on trying to shoo away one stranger's criticism.

But then I realize, this 'Kurt's movie credits' list is only partially helpful.  And when it comes to worth, partial help leaves you feeling restless.

Finally, I turned to the words of an ancient poet that I memorized many years ago just for these very moments.

"My soul finds rest in God alone."
(Psalm 62)

So, I turned to the center and rested there.

Saturday, August 22, 2015

Crabbypants and making up

So, I was in a major funk!  Tired, stressed, overwhelmed with my insane "to-do" list - you get the
picture!  In our home, we affectionately call this "Mrs. Crabbypants".  So, as I marched around with my not so cute pants on, guess who I took it out on?!

No, we don't have a dog! ( all of our girls wished we did!)  lol!

Instead, my man received the full vomit of my state of being.  

Yikes!  

It was not pretty!

But I got it and well...I felt a little better.  but I decided what I most needed was a little space and some rest.

So, I took a nap.  

WOW!  That really helped.  But what was interesting, was I soon found out that the crabby pants had switched people.  My man was super frustrated and as we sat down to chat, he vented.  

He was super frustrated with none other than yours truly!

Me?  How could that be?

So, as we continued to chat, I realized a couple of things: one, I saw my high expectations show it's ugly head...again; two, I realized that I hadn't communicated clearly before to my man, so he thought I was disappointed in him, our summer, what we had accomplished ( or not!) .etc. and I clearly wasn't, so it meant that I needed to clarify more clearly; three, it made me super thankful for my man who is willing to be crazy real and go there with me.

Whew...

So, how did it all end?

After a few tears ( it's what we do as women!) and more conversation, we asked each other what we needed from each other.  (this has become our favorite question lately!)  

I shared that I needed time and space to work on some of the things I had struggled to write down on my "to do" list. Kurt happily said he would watch the kiddos the rest of the day, so I could get that.

Sigh!

A couple hours later, I was in a much better place emotionally, mentally, physically..etc.

So, yes it was a super hard couple of hours for me and well....us!  But, it's in those harder moments, that we have the potential to open up, share the junk and be safe with the one who cherishes us.  Yet, it's risky and often I want to put up those walls, pull away, be independent, instead of letting my sweet man in.

Ugh.

Still so much growth that has to happen.

But at the end of the day, Kurt and I were more connected and those crabbypants were no where to find!

Somewhere we had read that "make-up intimacy" is pretty sweet, so we thought it was just the perfect time to see how true that was?  

And well.... it most definitely was!!!  ;)

Wednesday, August 19, 2015

Our first Greek wedding!

Last weekend we filmed our first Greek wedding!  It was fascinating!  The service at St. Demetrios included the wearing of crowns, the bride's godmother placing the rings on Maria and Bobby, a chanter, and the priest leading the couple around a table with almonds!

In the morning we had the chance to see Maria and her bridesmaids getting ready at the salon, Fringe and Foundation, in Westlake.  Here's a little video we shot on our iPhone at the salon, capped off with a quick shot of the Maria and Bobby after they tied the knot.

Enjoy!

A video posted by Kurt & Beth (@forrealweddingfilms) on

Monday, August 17, 2015

The more men I meet, the more I love my dog

The other day, I saw a bumper sticker that read:

The more men I meet
The more I love my dog

It's a chuckler, but then it just makes you sad.

You know what the appeal of a dog is?  Simplicity.

Men are not simple.  Women are not simple.

We are whole histories, DNAs, family-backgrounds, habits, senses of humor, moods, needs, hopes, desires, passions, annoyances, quirks, weaknesses, and glories.

If you are married, step back for a moment and take in the immense privilege it is to share in one person's whole world.

Privileges are not always easy or simple, but we consider them an honor because of the immense value of the work.

The privilege of blessing one other person's universe is, from an earth-perspective, taxing, but from the heavenly perspective, a glory to which few other life experiences can compare.

Let's all of us try to remind ourselves of that glory.

Or I guess you can get a dog.

Saturday, August 15, 2015

A website is coming...for real!!!

Some of you know that we have been on this journey of developing a wedding videography business for a few years, but alas, minus a good website.

Well, the wait is nearly over!  (You were all waiting, right?).  Next weekend we will officially announce our new site and hope you will all come check it out!  There will be promotions, fireworks, candy bags, Presidential visits, creepy carnival rides...ok, but there will be promotions!  Especially for you or your friends who may be looking for a downright awesome wedding film!

Stay tuned!

In the meantime, enjoy our new logo!
Kurt and Beth