3 Adventure Movies with passion

Like every boy growing up I loved adventure movies.

Indiana Jones

Romancing the Stone

Crocodile Dundee

These are just a few films that graced the VHS player in our family living room in the 1980's.  Besides beating up Nazis and wrestling crocodiles the next best part of imagining being the hero was rescuing the pretty girl.  Before I was old enough to like real, live girls, I knew I wanted to rescue them.

I love the image of the ruddy, muscular hero, cradling the frightened girl in his left arm, while holding a vine (or some other escape route) in the other.  Noticeably, neither the guy nor damsel in distress looked at each other; their eyes were ahead of themselves-on the mission ahead.

While I love looking in my girl's eyes, I also love the fact that we look forward together with a shared sense of mission.  Beth and I share a heart to encourage relationships and to help people connect with God in a real way.  So much of what we do with our lives and our parenting has to do with these shared visions.

Certainly, we have separate passions too.  But even that is shared because we are both committed to encouraging each other's passions.

All of these things give us a bigger picture in life and help us see our marriage in the context of a desire to "change the world."

Do you and your spouse have a shared passion?  Have you talked about it?  Is there a way to get your hearts behind it intentionally?

Maybe you don't share the same vision, but can you together work to help each other pursue your individual passions?

The first step for each of these is simply to talk: Ask your spouse, "What are you passionate about?"  and don't criticize it.  Then ask, "What can I do to support you in it?"

Then go out there and beat up those Nazis and wrestle some crocodiles!  G'day, mate!

I will never shave my legs again & 6 other unnatural things

"I will never shave my legs again," says Suzannah Weiss in her article on Yahoo.

Her reason: It's not natural and it's only purpose is to please men.

Has she ever considered what else is not natural?
It's not natural to:
be monogamous
smell nice
be tender while making love
take care of your spouse when he/she is sick
take regular showers
dress up

None of these things happen in nature, but thank God that many humans rise above nature and choose to love and be considerate by...doing unnatural things for the sake of pleasing others.

What about the charge that shaving legs is a waste of time because its purpose is just to please men?  The implication is that: men don't shave their legs!  Why should I?  In other words, men don't make uncomfortable sacrifices-so this is unfair.

Men and women are attracted to different things.  Men are very visual in their attractions.  Women are not AS visually driven.  A common attraction for women, though, is a man who is strong (whether physical, mental, or emotional) and who wants to provide and care for a woman.

I'm sure a lot of men would rather sit around with a beer and a football or video game for the majority of their time (and some men do!), but mature men choose to do something that will make them more attractive: grow up, get a job, and be responsible.

Suzannah Weiss is not my target here.  It's an attitude that we are fighting each other as sexes and as spouses.  Instead of resenting our sacrifices for each other, it's good to take a few moments and realize what sacrifices our spouses make for us day in and day out.  Let's not take them for granted.  Take the opportunity to say thank you today to your spouse for all those unnatural sacrifices they make each day, even down to the 'little things' of leg shaving.

Til Death Do Us Part: The Top Five Regrets of the Dying, part 3

Intro from my previous posts on this book: Here and here.

Bronnie Ware worked for many years in hospice and end-of-life care work.  She walked numerous people through their last days.  During those years, as she sat and talked with men and women in their twilight days, she found a few recurring regrets and shared those in her book: The Top Five Regrets of the Dying: A Life Transformed by the Dearly Departing.

The book is worth the read so my little summary barely scratches the surface.  However, over the next few weeks, I hope to share the five regrets and see how they relate to marriage.

Regret #3:

I wish I'd had the courage to express my feelings

Isn't it funny that many of us enter marriage with the desire to be fully known and share our deepest selves with each other, but then find ourselves closing up over time?

Bronnie Ware found this regret often in those whose days were short.  Why hadn't they said the important things they wanted to say?  Why had they chosen to be silent all those years?

Take stock today.
What have you longed to tell your spouse?
What have you been holding back from your spouse?
What has been brimming into your chest so long, but has never found its way out?
What have you wanted to say but felt silly?
What is a part of your inner life that you wish you could share with the one you love?

We all know these things are not as simple as they seem, and sometimes we have wise reasons for not expressing our feelings.

But is there something of value in your heart that is really being held back for reasons that have little weight?  Is it time to avoid the regret and have the courage to express your feelings this day?

Are Phones Killing your Affection? 12 things to fight it.

An artist by the name of Luke Jerram was sitting in a laundromat when he was struck by the silence.

No one talked to each other.  Then and there he came up with an idea: put a piano in public places to get people to talk to each other.

So, he did it.  In fact, he did it with over 1300 pianos in cities all over the globe!

A philanthropist who funded the project stated, "I wanted to see people get together.  I wanted people to connect with one another.  I wanted people to talk to one another instead of playing with all these mechanical things that they have."

"These mechanical things" can make couples feel like the people at laundromats too.  We love each other, right?  We couldn't wait to get married and connect any time of day or night, right?

So, how did some of us get to the point where technology keeps us connected to so many people and things, but not each other?

If this describes your situation, consider trying out Jerram's conversation piece approach.  Are there things you could put out in your house or apartment to get you the two of you talking?

What are some things that, if left on the kitchen table, night stand, or coffee table, would get you to interact?

1. A board game?

2. A card game?
3. Your wedding album?
4. A photo book?
5. Lingerie? :)
6. A travel site on an iPad?
7. A couple's devotion book?
8. A children's book?
9. A keepsake?
10. A rock you saved from a trip?
11. An old birthday card?
12. An old yearbook?

Any number of things could give you a little something to connect with, laugh about, read, or reminisce over.

Give it a try and fight the power of "these mechanical things"!

 

8 Things Husbands Wish Their Wives Knew About Men

If you could survey husbands about what they wish someone could tell their wives about male sexual nature, what do you think the men would say?

Dr. Archibald Hart, a retired senior professor of psychology and dean emeritus, a licensed psychologist, and author of 33 books found out the answer to this question.

In his book The Sexual Man, Hart states, “here are some of the most common messages I’ve been asked by frustrated husbands to communicate to their wives.

1.       I’m not abnormal

2.       I can’t help it if I come on strong sexually

3.       If I inadvertently look at another woman, it doesn’t mean I desire her over you.

4.       Once in a while I would like you to initiate lovemaking

5.       I like a bit of novelty now and then, and I wish you understood that.

6.       I don’t want our kids to spoil our sexual life.

7.       Sometimes it’s not sex I’m wanting, just time together….Husbands fear that their wives are avoiding [any] intimacy because they assume it will lead to sex.

8.       I like to talk about our sex.  Why don’t you?”

Friday List Days: Boundaries

Do you say yes more than no to other people’s demands?

Do you get resentful of all the things you do for others?

Are you good at hiding resentment with a happy face?

Do you often feel guilty if you let others down?

Do you feel like a victim?

Do you find yourself smiling when inwardly you are angry…but feel selfish that you are angry?

Are you overstressed or overtired because you’re trying to meet other’s expectations or needs?

If you relate to these it’s likely that you are a people-pleaser. 

Welcome to the club!  I was one for a very long time.  And while I still tend toward being accommodating, I have come a long way in asserting myself.

A seminal book on the subject is simply named Boundaries by Henry Cloud and John Townsend. 

The beginning principle is this: We are responsible for us and what is in our boundaries.  We cannot control what belongs in other people’s boundaries, nor is anyone else allowed to control what is in our boundaries. 

The following are ours and no one else’s:

Feelings

Attitudes and Beliefs

Behaviors

Choices

Values

Limits

Talents

Thoughts

Desires

Love

No one can make us do anything.  But for those of us who are people-pleasers that seems so untrue! 

The authors state, “Compliants take on too many responsibilities and set too few boundaries, not by choice, but because they are afraid.”

Fear.  Because of fear we open our borders and let people trespass on our property. 

I’ll try to explore that some more soon.

6 Ways to Tell a Man What You Need

We have quoted before from the brilliant book by Alison Armstrong called The Queen's Code.  This
is yet another quote brimming with true wisdom.  Instead of us doing much commentary, we'll just let the book speak for itself!

How to Tell a Man What You Need

1.  Ask for a time to talk “about something I need today/tomorrow/next week.”
         •  Keep your voice warm (but not falsely light) so he doesn’t think he’s in trouble.
         •  If his body tenses up, come right out and say, “Don’t worry, you’re not in trouble.”
         •  Tell him how many minutes you think it will take and don’t underestimate to make it seem easier.
         •  Make an appointment.
(This is because he’s Single Focused and you want him focused on what you tell him. Don’t attempt a ‘Needs Conversation’ while he’s focused on anything else, like driving, dressing, eating, reading, etc.!)

2.  When it’s time to talk, thank him for what a great Provider he is.
(Men play for points — this lets him know he’s in a game he can win.)

3.  Tell him what you NEED. Use that word and be specific:
         •  When you need it, exactly, including how often if it’s an ongoing need.
         •  What it would look like. Don’t assume he’ll interpret words the same as you.

4.  Tell him what receiving this would Provide for you. Be specific:
         •  What you’ll be able to be/do/accomplish/handle.
         •  How it will make you feel and why that matters.

5.  Ask “The Partner Question”: Is there anything you need to give me what I need?
(And open your mind; it probably isn’t what you’d require.)

6.  Ask: Is there a particular way I can show my appreciation for you giving me this? (And open your mind …)

Excerpt From: Alison A. Armstrong. “The Queen's Code.” Routledge. iBooks.

Again, this book is worth it's weight in gold.  Consider purchasing the printed version or the online version (that comes with accompanying videos)

Til Death Do Us Part: The Top Five Regrets of the Dying #2

Last week we started a series based on Bronnie Ware's book, The Top Five Regrets of the Dying: A Life Transformed by the Dearly Departed.

The second most common regret Ware came across while caring for those in their twilight days was:

"I wish I hadn't worked so hard."

You've probably heard the cliché "No one on their deathbed wishes they had stayed longer at the office."  Clichés are there because there's a lot of truth to them. 

I once was the head of the theatre department at the school where I teach.  I was known as the drama guy.  I took a program that had floundered for a number of years and made it into one with a strong reputation and a lot of popularity.  Over the course of nearly a decade I directed mysteries, comedies, plays of Shakespeare's, and musicals. 

The trouble is: it kept me after work over and over again for months at a time.

Once we had our second daughter, I felt the tug of my Father: come home, Kurt.  There was a lot of notoriety and prestige that went with leading that program, but I don't miss it at all. 

I love that I get to come home to my wife and my kids each day.  I get to help Beth around the house.  I get to read with the kids at night.  I get to rest so I have energy to be happy for Beth. 

Again and again, Beth and I return to this choice as an object-lesson-showing us how worth it is when we choose "us" over work. 

As we have grown our video business the issue comes up again, but we endeavor, now with more wisdom, to use our time wisely so we can love our work, but still give it limits so it doesn't take away from that which is more important.

Til Death Do Us Part: The Top 5 Regrets of the Dying

Ok, I know this sounds like a morbid topic, but let me explain.

We all have special moments in life when the big picture seems more clear than at other times.  For many the end of life provides a unique time to reflect back on it all and ask, "Did I truly pursue the most worthy things in life."

Bronnie Ware worked for many years in hospice and end-of-life care work.  She walked numerous people through their last days.  During those years, as she sat and talked with men and women in their twilight days, she found a few recurring regrets and shared those in her book: The Top Five Regrets of the Dying: A Life Transformed by the Dearly Departing.

The book is worth the read so my little summary barely scratches the surface.  However, over the next few weeks, I hope to share the five regrets and see how they relate to marriage.

Regret #1:
"I wish I'd had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me."

Beth and I entered marriage with really good hearts: we wanted to be all that the other wanted.  That is really good...to a point. 

We found, over time, that the desire to please sometimes hides, sometimes intentionally and other times not, some realities about ourselves.  For example, I was not aware just how much of an introvert I really was for years.  But since Beth enjoyed people so much I willingly let our schedule fill up with activities that I found drained me and even at times pushed me to surliness.  We had to learn together how to accommodate my need for solitude.

Beth, in her desire to be a "good wife," often ignored her enjoyment of a creative outlet.  She threw herself into domestic needs, but didn't pursue some of the things she really enjoyed.  That's when I encouraged her to really go for it creatively.  She then started Beth Maechner Photography and we ran a successful portrait business for quite a few years before she decided it was time to go a different direction. 

So what would it look like if you were to live life more true to yourself?  How could your spouse help with this?

What would it look like for your spouse to live more true to him or herself?  What could you do to enable them to live it?

Worthy questions!

Will and Morgan Wedding film peek

Sorry, this is a day later than promised!
Here's a short clip of:
1. my favorite moment of Will and Morgan's ceremony :)
and
2. an early edit of part of their forthcoming wedding film.

This was one beautiful and fun-spirited wedding!



Morgan and Will's Sneak Peek from For Real Wedding Films on Vimeo.

Friday List Days: 5 Reasons Getting Away with your spouse is worth every penny

Beth and I get away without the kids for a night or two once a season (4x a year).  Here are just a few benefits of getting away:

1. You discover each other again.

Stephen Covey in his book The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People said that all of our activities fall into one of four categories:
-Urgent, but not important
-Important, but not urgent
-Urgent and Important
-Not urgent and not important

When you're at home, so much of life can be consumed by the "urgent, but not important."  When you get away, all of it (dishes, unfinished projects, holes in your screens, emails, phone messages, poopy diapers, groceries) are out of sight and out of mind.  That leaves: your bride or groom.  Suddenly, you have time to discover them again-minus the urgent, but unimportant distraction.

2. Your internal motor can idle.

When you take time to finally slow down and just be, you can recharge your batteries.  Once that happens, you can really l o o k at your spouse again and really l i s t e n.  When we get away we always build in time to let each other have individual time to do whatever-read, sleep, walk, pray, write, putz, think.

3. You can laugh again.

One of the joys of dating is doing fun stuff with each other.  When you get away, do that stuff.  It's hard to take time to have fun together at home sometimes.  There are so many urgent items to take care of.  But when you get away you can read together, play a board game, go for a walk, play tennis, play putt-putt, watch movies, eat at a pizza place, whatever.

4. You can finally talk about the tough, but important stuff.

You know those items that you'd really like to talk through with your spouse?  I'm talking about things on a heart level that would really help your marriage or future or family.  At home, it's hard to have those conversations because when can you do it when you're not tired, or won't get interrupted? Getting away is a great time for this.  Plus, you can plan on it and surround it with good downtime so you can connect first and also have some fun time to decompress after it.

5. .....
Where is it?  Ah, this one is for tomorrow!  :)

Are you putting too much pressure on your spouse? Wisdom from Romeo & Juliet

If you answer "yes" to several of the following questions, you might be putting unrealistic pressure on your spouse.

Do you expect him/her to be with you almost all the time?

Are you crushed when he/she fails you? 

Do you expect him/her to always listen?

Do you assume he/she will make you happy (or should)?

Do you regularly expect your spouse to come to your aid?

Do you expect him/her to make your life worth living?

Do you rely on him/her to make you feel good about yourself?

Do you see your spouse as having the job of bringing you peace?

In my daytime life, when I'm not filming weddings, I am an English teacher.  Each year I love, love, love teaching Romeo & Juliet.  I have a passion for Shakespeare's plays.  I try to read one or two new ones each year in my attempt at reading all of his shows.

I think there's something to learn about marriage from these two teens, but it may not be what you'd expect.

Romeo and Juliet is often talked about as if it were a portrayal of the most beautiful relationship.  I think that's silly and I don't think Shakespeare intended that either.  He presented a really foolish, impulsive couple that makes bad choices.  They are juxtaposed by their families, though, who hate each other for no good reason.  In a sense the play says, "Yeah, these two teens are dopey, but even they understood love better than these adults who should be a lot smarter!"

Anyway, the biggest error I see in these two lovers' relationship is one that is easy to fall into no matter what the stage of your relationship. 

They think the other person is god.

In the famous balcony scene, Juliet asks Romeo to swear to the truthfulness of his love.  He begins by swearing "by the moon."  She doesn't like that because the moon changes.  So, he tries to swear by something else.  Juliet stops him and says:

"Well, do not swear at all.  But if thou wilt, swear by thy gracious self, which is the god of my idolatry."

You see, here's what we expect of God.  We expect that he'll

-be with us always

-never fail us

-always listen

-make us happy

-do whatever we ask

-always come to our aid

-make our life worth living.

-make us feel good about ourselves.

-give us peace.

Appropriate for God, but not for a husband or wife.

These are not practical expectations for another human.  Sometimes we do this because we adore the other.  Sometimes we have these assumptions because we think that's what a spouse is supposed to do.

They all lead to dissolution and disappointment.

Let your lover off the god-hook.  Let them be a human.  Let God be God.

Romeo and Juliet made each other gods.  And when their god was gone, they had nothing left for which to live.

But if your wife or husband can be a fellow, faulty traveler on this journey called life, then you can appreciate the blessings they bring to you and forgive the faults when they get you wrong.

God can take care of the rest.

5 Love Languages Video

In this previous post we introduced the idea that each of us gives and receives love in different ways, or languages.  The 5 love languages honestly transformed the way Beth and I reacted to each other.  For so many of us, we are giving love, but our spouse doesn't think we are.  And we are receiving love, but we don't think so because we speak different "love languages" without realizing it.

This is a fantastic short video that illustrates the 5 love languages without any words.  Check it out.  It's really worth it.



The 5 Love Languages Trailer from Dr. Gary Chapman on Vimeo.

Simple Quiz: What's Your Love Language?

When we first got married, one of the key books we read was The Five Love Languages.  It has stuck with us throughout the years.  And now as we raise our little ladies, we're trying to figure them out.

There are 5 dominant love languages.  They are:

Words of affirmation - you love receiving and speaking life into others through encouraging words.

Acts of service - you naturally want to serve others, by doing things for them.

Physical touch - you tend to love hugs and give hugs to others...your very comfortable with forms of physical touch and enjoy it.

Gifts - buying and receiving a special gift means a lot to you.

Quality Time - going for a walk, grabbing coffee, playing basketball....etc. are your main way to show your love for someone else and how you feel most loved.

How well do you know your love language? What about your spouse?

Take this simple quiz, to figure it out.

1.  When asked how do you feel most loved, would you:

      a.  rather go to a movie with your girl?

      b.  buy that cute pair of shoes you've been wanting?

      c.  like holding hands with your man and being snuggly while reading a book?

      d.  love for your man to help you put up those twinkly cute lights you've wanted to do....since like forever?

      e.  like to receive a hand written letter from your girl?

This is just a very small version of a much more nuanced concept, but it's a fun beginning!

Here are some more thorough love language quizzes: 

from The Relationship Coach

from the official site.

Friday: Men, hold the barf can

In this past post we talked about how women can understand men's nature to want to find the point of

what a woman is saying.

Men, when you're listening you want to find out "the point."

Women, generally, do not operate this way.  Talking for them has value in and of itself.  Science shows that positive chemicals are emitted inside women purely from talking.

When a woman is upset, specifically, often she needs you to just hold the bucket.

In essence, she just needs to barf out all of her feelings and thoughts.  You just need to stand there and hold the barf can.

For some men it is hard to see how this has value, but to a woman, this is how she gets to solutions.

Here are three reasons for you to take this advice:

1. She's different than you.  

John Gray in Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus said that women have a well inside of them.  When upset, they go in the well and they need to get all the way to the bottom.  It will seem like she's getting worse initially, but that's because she needs to go all the way down.  Once she hits the bottom, then, and only then, she can come up.


2. It's actually the way to help SOLVE her problem.

As a man, what you can do is help her get to the bottom of the well by listening, asking questions, and letting her express.  She even may eventually want advice (what you've been wanting to give aaaall along!).

3. It takes off the pressure.

While everything inside of you usually is going crazy trying to figure out how to fix your lady's situation, if you know she's just in the well, you can relax, knowing that she doesn't need you to figure it all out.  The best solution is holding the can.

So, next time your wife, fiancee, or girlfriend seems to be headed into the well, happily grab that trash can, put the other arm around her, and let her have a go!

3 Things That Won't Change in Your Spouse

In a previous post I commented that "love me as I am" often means "I don't want to change for you."

I still stand by that, but it applies to some things and not others.

In other places, we've found that the best thing we can do for each other is to understand each other and learn to work with it, rather than be constantly frustrated.

Here are three areas to learn to accept.

1. GENDER
Beth long had been frustrated by how I get overwhelmed by too many demands or not being able to focus on her at various times.

Then we both started listening to a radio show that explained males and females.  Here we learned: Oh!  Men can ONLY focus on one thing at a time.  Now she understands and works with that.  She even teaches our girls to recognize how to gently interrupt daddy when they need his attention.

(This also explains when a guy has sex on his mind that he can't also maintain a conversation about planning for an upcoming family vacation.  He does care about that, but time with you is the only thing he can address right now.  True story :)

2. PERSONALITY STYLE
Beth loooves having people over and entertaining.  She's a people person.  I'm more of an introvert.  For years, I was so annoyed by her wanting to have people over and all the crazy house and food prep that this involved.

Then, I realized: Beth's "people-loving skills" are a huge gift to the world and a huge part of who God made her to be.  What the heck am I doing trying to thwart it?  That's when my heart changed and I started getting behind her and supporting her.

3. BIRTH ORDER
While Beth and I are both the babies of our family (we both have an older sibling), Beth is the only girl and, therefore, operates a bit like a firstborn.  That helped me realize that she wasn't just trying to railroad me when she creates all these structures and plans.  It's part of who she is.

I, on the other hand, operate much like a middle born (because of some family dynamics, I didn't take on the usual last born traits).  This means I'm very accommodating and like to bring peace.  Beth used to see this as not being willing to take charge.  She has learned to see that there's a lot of good in my approach that involves looking at things from different angles and seeing what works best for everyone. (a great book for understand birth order and relationships is here)

Action point: study each other and study yourself.  Though it doesn't apply all the time, many of these are cases to learn to love "the way they are."

5 Reasons a Wife Feels her Husband Hates Her

This sounds like a harsh topic, but it happens.

Maybe you saw it in your parents' or a friend's marriage.  Maybe, if your dating or engaged, you've seen slight signs of your guy being angry at you, not just inside an argument, but more generally.

I found this list on a site from Dr. Emerson & Sarah Eggerichs, a husband and wife team that are authors and male-female relation experts.  Here's "5 Possible Reasons a Wife Feels Her Husband Hates Her."

"1. THE HUSBAND TRULY HATES HER   I say this with great sadness, but he has chosen to hate you for reasons having little to do with you. You have loved him and treated him respectfully, but he has become bitter and hateful.

But TO THE REST OF YOU I want to give you hope. It might not be that he hates you at all. There is a misunderstanding.

2. THE HUSBAND MERELY ECHOES “I HATE YOU” AFTER SHE SAYS IT FIRST   In an argument you were the first to yell, “I hate you!” and he echoed, “I hate you!” right back.  He no more means it than you do.

3. THE WIFE HATES HERSELF AND PROJECTS THIS ONTO HIM  He does not hate you, but you hate yourself and wrongly assume he feels about you the way you feel about yourself.

A wife can see herself as fat and ugly, and so assumes her husband sees her as fat and ugly, too. She feels that she is a horrible mother and concludes her husband views her as a horrible mom, as well.

When we do not like ourselves, we find it next to impossible to think anyone else likes us.

4. THE WIFE ASSUMES HE HATES HER DUE TO HIS LACK OF APOLOGIZING   “But, Emerson, I know he hates me because he never says he is sorry.”

“He never apologizes to me. He closes me off for hours. Admittedly after our arguments he approaches me, tries to tickle me to make me laugh or invites me to watch T.V., but no apology. This has been his mode of operation for years. I question his love. I would never treat him this way and I love him. If he loved me, he’d seek my forgiveness. I can only conclude that he secretly hates me.”

I hear your womanly heart, but many men apologize by making loving gestures, even though they may not use the words, “I am sorry, will you forgive me?” 

As unacceptable as this method is to most women, it shows that he does not hate her.

5. THE HUSBAND DOES NOT HATE, BUT FEELS DISRESPECTED AND REACTS  Because you have shown him disrespect, he reacts in ways that feel unloving to you; thus you feel he hates you.

The truth is your husband loves you, but he thinks you do not like him or that you feel disrespect for him.

In my book Love & Respect, I address the Crazy Cycle–without love a wife reacts without
respect, and without respect a husband reacts without love.

Before you claim your husband hates you, reconsider whether you have been spinning on the Crazy Cycle.

As one gal emails, “He acted like he hated me. But after reading Love and Respect, I apologized for not giving him respect and not acknowledging he deserved respect for working at a job he hated in order to support his family all those years. His eyes teared up and he just held me tight. When I told him that I apologized to the girls (ages 28, 23 & 18) for not respecting him and for setting such a bad example, it was like I let the air out of a balloon. He just didn’t seem to have any nasty things left to say.”

Does your husband hate you? I don’t know your situation. What I do know is that if he does not, the best way to find out is move toward him like this wife did.

Let the air out of his balloon."

See the original article and an accompanying video here.

Top 5 Retro Wedding Songs

Need a wedding processional song and want to buck the 'typical' trend?

Go retro!

Here are some popular wedding processional songs from the past:

1960's
"Here, There, and Everywhere" by the Beatles

1970's
"Annie's Song" by John Denver



1980's
"Here and Now" by Luther Vandross



1990's
"Over the Rainbow" by Israel Kamakawiwo'ole